Didja Miss Me?

Back from the mean jungles of Bogue field, I got stories and plenty of em. Some will make you laugh, others will keep you awake at night, and even so others will make you want to unsubscribe to this blog and question our friendship.. I understand do what you gotta do, but its my job to ensure all three happen.

So as you may or may not have noticed a big part of MANspective has been missing the past couple of days, I apologize but i do have a real job other than writing this blog- so until this thing takes off and we start getting Oprah money from assholes like you reading and clicking the ads I have to do this Marine thing for a few more years.

so please, help us out, take a few seconds, look to the left or right of this and click on one of those ads...don't worry I'll wait...

Thanks, my kids can eat now, we appreciate that.

If you didn't click the ads, understand that you and you alone are solely responsible for my daughter reusing the same diaper for the next week..how do you live with yourself?

Moving on,

So there I was.....(all good stories in the history of story telling begin with some variation of that line-FACT)

Kicken it in the field with the tried and true Marines of MWSS-274, getten our Rambo on, digging trenches and eating bugs, actually we lived in our building and rat fucked MRE's while sweaten our dicks off in this blazing NC heat..but hey who's telling this story- ME- So I get to make shit up if I want to..unless you were there you wont know the difference so follow along and try to keep up.

So I spent the first week essentially at "work" while others made camp out in tents and did the dirty work, and the next out at Atlantic field getting eaten alive by bugs that could take down an elephant in 100 degree weather, I can't stress this enough- shitty events are even shittier when its as hot as two furry squirrels fucking in a wool sack on a mid summers day. Don't take this the wrong way, I had a lot of fun, I fucken love my job, who else gets paid to do this kind of shit?Who among you gets paid to shoot at things and get promoted on your killing potential and how fast you can run or how many pull ups you can do? can you go into work and just yell and scream all day at people? its a pretty bad ass job, anybody unemployed or looking for work for the next four years- I'm your man, hit me up.

Now it does come with its drawbacks, like this week, I had to forgo the Stanley Cup finals, while you lucky bastards celebrated by partying up and down the beautiful streets of Boston while I caught updates from my smart phone in the woods. I was beyond fucking pissed, devastated if you will.

Now some of you may or may not know this, but I wasn't there when my son was born...not a big deal really, I'm pretty sure he will forgive me someday, after all I was busy hunting terrorists where they sleep, freedom comes with a price and I gladly paid mine, what the hell have you done for your country? (note you can contribute by clicking those ads. its 100% American I promise, in fact NOT clicking those ads, is an act of treason.)

But honestly this came as more of a blow to me missing the Stanley Cup Finals than missing the birth of one of my little ankle biters, now before you get all self righteous and indignant on me for being a dick, let me explain..

I have three fucking kids ok? I made it for two out of the three, and honestly those are stats that I can live with, hitting two out of every three baseballs gets you into Cooperstown any day of the week and twice on Sunday, so get off my ball bag about it- besides if you knew how efficient my wife is at popping these things out, you would think she would be in the hall of fame of child birth- just flawless technique, in and out of there two hours tops... but how often do the B's skate into Vancouver and put such an ass whoopen on them that they burn their own city to the ground? like i said, just pure devastation that I missed this.. I can read all day about what those riots looked like, or how crazy the scene was, but i need to see this kind of shit! i want to be a part of the action. In case you were wondering, this just further solidifies my position as a sports asshole, (see my previous article titled"Am I Wrong?") love us or hate us, you can't mention sports without us, Boston is a fucken dynasty Gents get use to it, just dominating everything with a ball or stick... I'm just waiting for the day that we get outlawed from professional sports altogether, or at the very least they implement the "Boston handicap" rule, where as the opposing team automatically starts with a lead. Fuck you Canada, and eat a dick Vancouver...I'm out.